Dimvenlarpfag is a god.

It takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, two-faced dog.

Dimvenlarpfag created the Sun five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Dimvenlarpfag, it will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Dimvenlarpfag, it will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Dimvenlarpfag's most sacred site is Omaweneno in Botswana.

Dimvenlarpfag's Holy Commandments

1. You must pray to Dimvenlarpfag nine times a day.

2. Never think about the weak nuclear force.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

5. Do not kill porpoises.