Ditominkimtun is a god.

He takes the form of a three hundred metre long, awesome goblin.

Ditominkimtun created water eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Ditominkimtun, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Ditominkimtun, he will make you grow a tail.

Ditominkimtun's most sacred site is Zhelaizhai in China.

Ditominkimtun's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Always help horses.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Do not commit murder.

5. Run away from mauve pigs, for they are unholy.