Yatquagkad is a god.
He takes the form of an exceedingly large, loving
turtle.
Yatquagkad created the Sombrero Galaxy five million years ago.
If you believe in
Yatquagkad, he will answer your prayers.
If you do not believe in
Yatquagkad, he will turn you into a slug.
Yatquagkad's most sacred site is Vestfold in Norway.
Yatquagkad's Holy Commandments1. Do not eat turnips.
2. Never talk about fire.
3. Pray towards the west.
4. Paint representations of asteroids on the walls of your dwelling place in brown.
5. Erect six aluminium sculptures of Yatquagkad on top of important buildings.