Tailfarxem Sitpagflan is a god.

He takes the form of a very long, unselfish ant.

Tailfarxem Sitpagflan created dark energy three million years ago.

If you believe in Tailfarxem Sitpagflan, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Tailfarxem Sitpagflan, he will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Tailfarxem Sitpagflan's most sacred site is Bertkow in Germany.

Tailfarxem Sitpagflan's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate foxes.

2. Never look at planets.

3. Do not drink water in violet rooms.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of lead.

5. Never go into pink rooms.