Gatnibsad is a god.

It takes the form of a massive, staggering gnu.

Gatnibsad created dark energy five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gatnibsad, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Gatnibsad, it will be very sad.

Gatnibsad's most sacred site is Romlund in Denmark.

Gatnibsad's Holy Commandments

1. Always look after injured grasshopers.

2. Always take life seriously.

3. Gatnibsad must be the most important thing in your life.

4. Always help sick goats.

5. Show mercy to disobedient children.