Tagmanbin is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely large, fussy tortoise.

Tagmanbin created an up quark six billion years ago.

If you believe in Tagmanbin, it will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Tagmanbin, it will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Tagmanbin's most sacred site is Basalorum in Sweden.

Tagmanbin's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat lentils.

2. Run away if eight grasshopers approach from the north.

3. Run away from pink gulls, for they are unholy.

4. Do not jump in public.

5. Always help geese.