Gepmonont is a god.

She takes the form of a giant, moody owl.

Gepmonont created the solar system four billion years ago.

If you believe in Gepmonont, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Gepmonont, she will curse you with boils.

Gepmonont's most sacred site is Corsock in Scotland.

Gepmonont's Holy Commandments

1. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

2. Do not take Gepmonont's name in vain.

3. Put Gepmonont first in all things.

4. Do not fashion models of living things.

5. Never wear violet kilts.