Yokartloop is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, awe-inspiring horse.

Yokartloop created the cosmos three billion years ago.

If you believe in Yokartloop, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Yokartloop, he will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Yokartloop's most sacred site is Ringsted in Denmark.

Yokartloop's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about quantum mechanics near shrews while wearing green shorts and balancing nine iron spheres on your legs.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

4. Always treat tapirs with great respect.

5. Pray towards the east.