Nellnutlan Sogsomgem is a god.

It takes the form of a heavy, unsympathetic camel.

Nellnutlan Sogsomgem created the planet Venus seven million years ago.

If you believe in Nellnutlan Sogsomgem, it will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Nellnutlan Sogsomgem, it will make you grow a tail.

Nellnutlan Sogsomgem's most sacred site is Outchimedu in India.

Nellnutlan Sogsomgem's Holy Commandments

1. Respect your elders.

2. Never talk about goats.

3. Never wear jumpers.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate manatees.

5. Snakes are not to be trusted.