Quafrutnak is a god.

It takes the form of a six hundred metre long, flying cow.

Quafrutnak created the Sunflower Galaxy two million years ago.

If you believe in Quafrutnak, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Quafrutnak, it will turn you into an amoeba.

Quafrutnak's most sacred site is Uruachi in Mexico.

Quafrutnak's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat green fruit.

2. Do not hurt sheep.

3. Ducks are unholy and should not be approached.

4. Never think about thermodynamics near whales while wearing turquoise skirts and balancing three lead spheres on your neck.

5. Hide from mauve otters for they are unholy.