Dodbell is a god.

It takes the form of a galaxy-sized, two-faced octopus.

Dodbell created carbon five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Dodbell, it will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Dodbell, it will destroy your favourite solar system.

Dodbell's most sacred site is Questenberg in Germany.

Dodbell's Holy Commandments

1. Dodbell loves great tits, so they must be respected.

2. Never wear green coats.

3. Look mercifully on unfortunate monkeys.

4. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

5. Never hurt porpoises.