Vablenhen is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely fat, irritating wasp.

Vablenhen created the Whirlpool Galaxy nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Vablenhen, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Vablenhen, he will destroy your favourite star.

Vablenhen's most sacred site is Zhelaizhai in China.

Vablenhen's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about quantum mechanics.

2. Never eat nuts.

3. Never feed peanuts to eagles while wearing white rings.

4. Never write about black holes.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.