Sandtitleg is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly fat, all-knowing centipede.

Sandtitleg created viruses seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Sandtitleg, it will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Sandtitleg, it will turn you into a tree.

Sandtitleg's most sacred site is Krina in Germany.

Sandtitleg's Holy Commandments

1. Do not eat strawberries.

2. Do not speak about pineapples.

3. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

4. Fast once a month.

5. Never write about the strong nuclear force.