Flagquimxem is a god.

He takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, ruthless pigeon.

Flagquimxem created the Sol system nine million years ago.

If you believe in Flagquimxem, he will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Flagquimxem, he will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Flagquimxem's most sacred site is Ifaty in Madagascar.

Flagquimxem's Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Fast once a month.

3. Never talk about moons.

4. Always obey Flagquimxem's priests.

5. Never feed turnips to otters while wearing indigo ear rings.