Maptabspag is a god.

It takes the form of a four hundred metre long, idiotic tapir.

Maptabspag created humanity seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Maptabspag, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Maptabspag, it will not care.

Maptabspag's most sacred site is Evol in France.

Maptabspag's Holy Commandments

1. Do not commit murder.

2. Draw representations of dwarf planets on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Never talk about the weak nuclear force near goats while wearing turquoise scarves.

4. Run away if three ducks approach from the east.

5. Always make sure there are no snails in a building before entering it.