Megzimwodmum is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely heavy, witty fairy.

Megzimwodmum created Asia eight million years ago.

If you believe in Megzimwodmum, she will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Megzimwodmum, she will destroy your favourite galaxy.

Megzimwodmum's most sacred site is Meidrim in Wales.

Megzimwodmum's Holy Commandments

1. Erect seven zinc sculptures of Megzimwodmum on top of important buildings.

2. Always treat foxes with great respect.

3. Retreat if six manatees approach from the west.

4. Never play with disobedient children.

5. Never think about dark matter near grasshopers while wearing orange kilts and balancing three gold spheres on your back.