Volpadtal is a god.

She takes the form of a minute, weak cow.

Volpadtal created a down quark seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Volpadtal, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Volpadtal, she will attempt to scare you with strong winds.

Volpadtal's most sacred site is Dommerby in Denmark.

Volpadtal's Holy Commandments

1. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

2. Respect your elders.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate dolphins.

5. Look mercifully on unfortunate frogs.