Lakyattlip is a god.

It takes the form of a blubbery, deceitful naga.

Lakyattlip created a bottom quark eight million years ago.

If you believe in Lakyattlip, it will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Lakyattlip, it will remove you from existence.

Lakyattlip's most sacred site is Dommerby in Denmark.

Lakyattlip's Holy Commandments

1. Do not laugh in public.

2. Always help sharks.

3. Always obey Lakyattlip's priests.

4. Fast once a month.

5. Never talk about comets.