Nakfotwig is a god.

It takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, ruthless shark.

Nakfotwig created snails eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Nakfotwig, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Nakfotwig, it will come to you in dreams.

Nakfotwig's most sacred site is Demsin in Germany.

Nakfotwig's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if seven hamsters approach from the south.

2. Always stare at clouds.

3. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

4. Put Nakfotwig first in all things.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.