Sitquimrill is a god.

It takes the form of a planet-sized, witty warg.

Sitquimrill created humankind three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Sitquimrill, it will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Sitquimrill, it will have a low opinion of you.

Sitquimrill's most sacred site is Polagam in India.

Sitquimrill's Holy Commandments

1. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Sitquimrill.

2. Put Sitquimrill first in all things.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. Look mercifully on unfortunate gulls.

5. Never mention snakes.