Betzimkam is a god.

He takes the form of a galaxy-sized, confident capybara.

Betzimkam created the Sunflower Galaxy four billion years ago.

If you believe in Betzimkam, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Betzimkam, he will send minions to preach to you.

Betzimkam's most sacred site is Monong in Botswana.

Betzimkam's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about asteroids.

2. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Betzimkam.

3. Erect five aluminium sculptures of Betzimkam on top of important buildings.

4. Never go into pink rooms.

5. Do not listen to music.