Gessmitbep is a god.

She takes the form of a rotund, dishonourable crane.

Gessmitbep created the Tadpole Galaxy eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Gessmitbep, she will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Gessmitbep, she will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Gessmitbep's most sacred site is Landsort in Sweden.

Gessmitbep's Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. Always help badgers in need.

3. Always wear orange.

4. Walk at least five thousand metres per day.

5. Never play with disobedient children.