Larnhatpadvegsogarm is a god.

He takes the form of a very thin, omnipotent wren.

Larnhatpadvegsogarm created Asia nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Larnhatpadvegsogarm, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Larnhatpadvegsogarm, he will have a very low opinion of you.

Larnhatpadvegsogarm's most sacred site is Quellendorf in Germany.

Larnhatpadvegsogarm's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed corn to porpoises while wearing dresses.

2. Never hurt frogs.

3. Do not drink water in orange rooms.

4. Never write about the strong nuclear force.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.