Affetdag is a god.

She takes the form of a very thin, effective cow.

Affetdag created the Cigar Galaxy seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Affetdag, she will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Affetdag, she will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Affetdag's most sacred site is Ilmola in Finland.

Affetdag's Holy Commandments

1. Do not covet oxen.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of zinc.

3. Paint representations of moons on the walls of your dwelling place in gray.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

5. Never paint your head white.