Pakzaksug is a god.

He takes the form of a slender, merciful mole.

Pakzaksug created vertebrates two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Pakzaksug, he will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Pakzaksug, he will be very unhappy.

Pakzaksug's most sacred site is Bodieve in England.

Pakzaksug's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about electromagnetism near geese while wearing black tights and balancing three carbon spheres on your head.

2. Do not drink water in orange rooms.

3. Never paint your legs pink.

4. Always make sure there are no mites in a room before entering it.

5. Do not keep six birds in a large pit.