Cisstif is a god.

She takes the form of a very thin, witless whale.

Cisstif created Africa two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cisstif, she will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Cisstif, she will turn you into a mole.

Cisstif's most sacred site is Ifaty in Madagascar.

Cisstif's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about solid mechanics near whales while wearing purple shirts.

2. Respect your elders.

3. Fast once a month.

4. You must pray to Cisstif eight times a day.

5. Hide from blue geese for they are unholy.