Pomtonpang Gutsandqueeg is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely heavy, prudent fox.

Pomtonpang Gutsandqueeg created a top quark two billion years ago.

If you believe in Pomtonpang Gutsandqueeg, it will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Pomtonpang Gutsandqueeg, it will think nothing of it.

Pomtonpang Gutsandqueeg's most sacred site is Bogogobo in Botswana.

Pomtonpang Gutsandqueeg's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your face.

2. Never hurt monkeys.

3. Fast once a month.

4. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

5. Never wear indigo shirts.