Teenxemcenmutcusssatflagwee is a god.

He takes the form of a massive, confident human.

Teenxemcenmutcusssatflagwee created parasitic wasps nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Teenxemcenmutcusssatflagwee, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Teenxemcenmutcusssatflagwee, he will turn you into a dog.

Teenxemcenmutcusssatflagwee's most sacred site is Penhale in England.

Teenxemcenmutcusssatflagwee's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.

2. Your children must be taught to worship Teenxemcenmutcusssatflagwee.

3. Teenxemcenmutcusssatflagwee loves squirrels, so they must be honoured.

4. Do not drink alcohol.

5. Never think about the strong nuclear force.