Satkandob is a god.

He takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, self-assured dryad.

Satkandob created the Sun five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Satkandob, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Satkandob, he will throw large rocks at you.

Satkandob's most sacred site is Manna in Greece.

Satkandob's Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair white.

2. Do not speak about lemons.

3. Never think about horizontal gene transfer.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Never paint your arms blue.