Bessdambonk Satguthak is a god.
It takes the form of a planet-sized, resourceful
aardvark.
Bessdambonk Satguthak created Africa eight billion years ago.
If you believe in
Bessdambonk Satguthak, it will look on you favourably.
If you do not believe in
Bessdambonk Satguthak, it will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.
Bessdambonk Satguthak's most sacred site is Maijoma in Mexico.
Bessdambonk Satguthak's Holy Commandments1. Always obey Bessdambonk Satguthak's priests.
2. You must love Bessdambonk Satguthak.
3. Always wear pink.
4. Do not keep six tortoises in a large pit.
5. Never play with disobedient children.