Ganlakbogkaptad is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely fat, ruthless armadillo.

Ganlakbogkaptad created an electron four billion years ago.

If you believe in Ganlakbogkaptad, she will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Ganlakbogkaptad, she will send minions to preach to you.

Ganlakbogkaptad's most sacred site is Minnigaff in Scotland.

Ganlakbogkaptad's Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of comets on the walls of your dwelling place in black.

2. Do not fashion models of living things.

3. Always help goats.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.