Pidnillhadontgubrotkiplit Wigvidhun Pogkinquimkabfadfubtom is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, egotistical jaguar.

Pidnillhadontgubrotkiplit Wigvidhun Pogkinquimkabfadfubtom created the Sun six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Pidnillhadontgubrotkiplit Wigvidhun Pogkinquimkabfadfubtom, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Pidnillhadontgubrotkiplit Wigvidhun Pogkinquimkabfadfubtom, he will not care.

Pidnillhadontgubrotkiplit Wigvidhun Pogkinquimkabfadfubtom's most sacred site is Vambupet in India.

Pidnillhadontgubrotkiplit Wigvidhun Pogkinquimkabfadfubtom's Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. Always pray in complete darkness.

3. Always obey Pidnillhadontgubrotkiplit Wigvidhun Pogkinquimkabfadfubtom's priests.

4. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

5. Feed all hungry gulls.