Kengonjon is a god.

It takes the form of a very thin, self-confident squirrel.

Kengonjon created tapeworms two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Kengonjon, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Kengonjon, it will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Kengonjon's most sacred site is Leswalt in Scotland.

Kengonjon's Holy Commandments

1. Walk at least four thousand metres per day.

2. Never play with disobedient children.

3. Always make sure there are no dogs in a building before entering it.

4. Worship no other gods but Kengonjon.

5. Do not drink water in pink rooms.