Zastzissman is a god.

He takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, weak horse.

Zastzissman created Asia five million years ago.

If you believe in Zastzissman, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Zastzissman, he will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Zastzissman's most sacred site is Rutalahti in Finland.

Zastzissman's Holy Commandments

1. Always wear cyan.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. Never talk about cell theory.

4. Never mention birds.

5. Do not fashion models of living things.