Nart Futsanmit Quartjenxemdob is a god.

She takes the form of an enormous, self-confident goat.

Nart Futsanmit Quartjenxemdob created an electron two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nart Futsanmit Quartjenxemdob, she will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Nart Futsanmit Quartjenxemdob, she will try to impress you with trees.

Nart Futsanmit Quartjenxemdob's most sacred site is Sarti in Greece.

Nart Futsanmit Quartjenxemdob's Holy Commandments

1. Never laugh near cats.

2. Never hop in the presence of great tits.

3. Erect seven silver sculptures of Nart Futsanmit Quartjenxemdob on top of important buildings.

4. Do not shave your hands.

5. Draw representations of dwarf planets on the walls of your dwelling place.