Cumdissbim is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, sapient duck.

Cumdissbim created dark energy two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cumdissbim, he will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Cumdissbim, he will turn you into a giant snail.

Cumdissbim's most sacred site is Ronda in Spain.

Cumdissbim's Holy Commandments

1. Always stare at clouds.

2. Put Cumdissbim first in all things.

3. Nematodes are not to be trusted.

4. Do not take Cumdissbim's name in vain.

5. Never write about dark energy.