Hunwanvonk is a god.

It takes the form of a giant, stupid lion.

Hunwanvonk created the solar system five million years ago.

If you believe in Hunwanvonk, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Hunwanvonk, it will destroy your home planet.

Hunwanvonk's most sacred site is Pandamatenga in Botswana.

Hunwanvonk's Holy Commandments

1. Do not trade with those who eat onions.

2. Never think about comets.

3. Do not listen to music.

4. Hunwanvonk must be the most important thing in your life.

5. Never mention sheep.