Dunbuttap is a god.

It takes the form of a massive, cheerful salamander.

Dunbuttap created everything that exists two million years ago.

If you believe in Dunbuttap, it will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Dunbuttap, it will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Dunbuttap's most sacred site is Panormos in Greece.

Dunbuttap's Holy Commandments

1. Look mercifully on unfortunate dogs.

2. Paint representations of black holes on the walls of your dwelling place in black.

3. Put Dunbuttap first in all things.

4. Never go into purple rooms.

5. Do not covet oxen.