Taltargbifquafmum is a god.

She takes the form of a very thin, effective goat.

Taltargbifquafmum created the Andromeda Galaxy five billion years ago.

If you believe in Taltargbifquafmum, she will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Taltargbifquafmum, she will turn you into a hamster.

Taltargbifquafmum's most sacred site is Snapp in Sweden.

Taltargbifquafmum's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray in complete darkness.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Never talk about special relativity near sheep while wearing yellow hats and balancing three carbon spheres on your head.

5. Never play with disobedient children.