Gepcabwik is a god.

It takes the form of a five hundred metre long, cheerful walrus.

Gepcabwik created the Virgo Supercluster two million years ago.

If you believe in Gepcabwik, it will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Gepcabwik, it will turn you into a sheep.

Gepcabwik's most sacred site is Altata in Mexico.

Gepcabwik's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

2. Moths are unholy and should not be approached.

3. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

4. Never talk about ultrasonics near tapirs while wearing pink dresses and balancing seven zinc spheres on your legs.

5. Do not wear silicon on your body.