Camzakhiv Fatlagarm is a god.

She takes the form of a plump, sage mouse.

Camzakhiv Fatlagarm created a down quark nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Camzakhiv Fatlagarm, she will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Camzakhiv Fatlagarm, she will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Camzakhiv Fatlagarm's most sacred site is Skive in Denmark.

Camzakhiv Fatlagarm's Holy Commandments

1. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Camzakhiv Fatlagarm.

2. Never hurt whales.

3. Worship no other gods but Camzakhiv Fatlagarm.

4. Never think about galaxies.

5. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.