Fedbunmum is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly large, dishonourable lizard.

Fedbunmum created parasitic wasps five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fedbunmum, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Fedbunmum, he will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Fedbunmum's most sacred site is Goldcliff in Wales.

Fedbunmum's Holy Commandments

1. Do not sit in public.

2. Always help sick foxes.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of nickel.

4. Never go into yellow rooms.

5. Never talk about ultrasonics near grasshopers while wearing orange kilts and balancing five iron spheres on your face.