Watfunnarwaphotmumtanlig is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely heavy, effective lobster.

Watfunnarwaphotmumtanlig created time and space seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Watfunnarwaphotmumtanlig, it will not care.

If you do not believe in Watfunnarwaphotmumtanlig, it will destroy your home planet.

Watfunnarwaphotmumtanlig's most sacred site is Corsock in Scotland.

Watfunnarwaphotmumtanlig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not kill goats.

2. Always wear blue.

3. Never eat gooseberries.

4. Learn four new languages a year.

5. Do not eat onions.