Foncithug is a god.

She takes the form of a very thin, overgenerous gorilla.

Foncithug created the cosmos nine million years ago.

If you believe in Foncithug, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Foncithug, she will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Foncithug's most sacred site is Turckheim in France.

Foncithug's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to music.

2. Never think about chlorophyll.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

5. Always help nematodes in need.