Bonkminwat is a god.

It takes the form of a massive, wise camel.

Bonkminwat created Africa eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bonkminwat, it will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Bonkminwat, it will turn you into a duck.

Bonkminwat's most sacred site is Corsock in Scotland.

Bonkminwat's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear mauve corsets.

2. Never sprint near turtles.

3. Never feed lentils to tortoises while wearing tights.

4. Never think ill of sick horses.

5. Always obey Bonkminwat's priests.