Mapnarlam is a god.

She takes the form of a fat, unthoughtful scorpion.

Mapnarlam created the Black Eye Galaxy six billion years ago.

If you believe in Mapnarlam, she will not care.

If you do not believe in Mapnarlam, she will denounce you as a heretic.

Mapnarlam's most sacred site is Diebzig in Germany.

Mapnarlam's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about dark energy near sharks while wearing violet shorts.

2. Erect four iron sculptures of Mapnarlam on top of important buildings.

3. Always make sure there are no whales in a building before entering it.

4. Do not drink alcohol.

5. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.