Flapsisbap is a god.

She takes the form of a slim, boastful snail.

Flapsisbap created a down quark twelve years ago.

If you believe in Flapsisbap, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Flapsisbap, she will not care at all.

Flapsisbap's most sacred site is Artena in Italy.

Flapsisbap's Holy Commandments

1. Erect nine silver sculptures of Flapsisbap on top of important buildings.

2. Respect your elders.

3. Never look in ponds.

4. Never eat gooseberries.

5. Do not wear copper on your body.