Yokzennill is a god.

He takes the form of a slim, pitiless dugong.

Yokzennill created water seven million years ago.

If you believe in Yokzennill, he will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Yokzennill, he will destroy your favourite planet.

Yokzennill's most sacred site is Leswalt in Scotland.

Yokzennill's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed spinach to squirrels while wearing white corsets.

2. Never go into purple rooms.

3. Do not listen to music.

4. Do not wear brown clothing.

5. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.