Tapdumwod is a god.

It takes the form of a thin, merciless gnu.

Tapdumwod created a photon four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tapdumwod, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Tapdumwod, it will destroy your favourite solar system.

Tapdumwod's most sacred site is Xaaga in Mexico.

Tapdumwod's Holy Commandments

1. Never hurt sharks.

2. Put Tapdumwod first in all things.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of lead.

4. Run away from fawn seals, for they are unholy.

5. Do not kill snails.