Fumgodwongeb is a god.

He takes the form of a huge, competent alligator.

Fumgodwongeb created a bottom quark nine million years ago.

If you believe in Fumgodwongeb, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Fumgodwongeb, he will destroy your favourite planet.

Fumgodwongeb's most sacred site is Meidrim in Wales.

Fumgodwongeb's Holy Commandments

1. Look mercifully on unfortunate ducks.

2. Never eat onions.

3. Always make sure there are no tortoises in a room before entering it.

4. Always pray in complete darkness.

5. Never feed lots of nuts to frogs while wearing green kilts.